SRAADDHAM RITUAL OF THE OLDEN DAYS

SRAADDHAM RITUAL OF THE OLDEN DAYS

Today, the 8^th June, 2025, is my dear father’s 67^th death anniversary. He passed away in 1958 when I was 21 years old. From then on, I was taking leave every year and travelled from Bombay (present Mumbai) to my home in Palghat, present Palakkad, so that I could perform the sraadham in the presence of my mother and siblings. This went on for about ten years and then we shifted to Bombay. Even here, I was performing this ritual in my quarters, till my mother’s demise.

But Time waits for no man and my small flat did not allow me to conduct this function as elaborately as I had done years back in Palakkad. So, as per the suggestion from my family vadhyar, I began performing it as Hiranya-sraadham, which meant that I donate some rice, raw plantain, betel leaves and ‘supari’, along with good ‘dakshina’. He would instruct me some manthras asking pardon from the ancestors and do aseervadam in the end. The whole process took about 30 minutes. Sometimes, we gave some tiffin and coffee.

In contrast, see how we performed a Sraadham in good old days.

The local family vadhyar visited our house to inform us about my father’s forthcoming death anniversary. I was ready for the day since last week. I had visited the handloom store and purchased two “pathaaru” (10 muzham and 6 muzham) dhotis to be given to the brahmins.  (Two muzhams made one yard, 36 inches). With mother’s help, I cut them into two parts, one of 5 yards and the other of 3 yards. 

Mother gave a list of vegetables meant for the occasion: snake-gourd, bitter-gourd, Raw plantain fruit, yam, sweet potato, tender plantain stem, cluster beans, pumpkin, arvi – all these were needed to prepare the dishes. We could have curry leaves but not chillies nor dania leaves. Instead of chillies, we had to use pepper powder. We prepared only certain prescribed dishes – some may not be to our taste. No coconut oil. Only til oil. No pulses are to be used except moong dal. The grocery items needed were: black til, wheat powder, jiggery, rice powder, ghee, ulundu dal, etc. Coconut was not used for curries.

The vadhyar came in the afternoon of the previous day and collected the dhoties for wetting and keeping on the clothesline beyond the reach of any person, to keep their sanctity. So also, my parents kept their dresses to be worn for sraadha separately in a sanctified condition.

On the sraadha day, early in the morning, say 4 a.m. or so, my parents became busy. Father cut the vegetables for the minimum five curries. Mother started to get the flour, jaggery, ghee and other items needed to prepare the sweets and snacks for feeding the Brahmins. These include items called uppittu, sugiyan, neyyappam, thenkozhal, vadai and ellurundai. Tamarind and turmeric powder could not be used for the curries.

After an early bath, my parents were ready in their traditional dress. Mother would be ready with the curries by 8.45 a.m. with firewood and charcoal. She had the help of one or two ladies from the neighbouring houses.

Around 9 a.m., three vadhyars showed up. Two of them represented the departed souls and the third, the instructor to my father. The two were given “asanas” (seats) in the form of “palakai” to sit and to the accompaniment of manthra, were given ellurundais (til balls) and til oil in a small vessel. They were also given some “cheekkakkai” powder as a substitute for soap. The two Brahmins went to the river, took bath with oil smeared on the bodies and washing the oil with the cheekkakkai powder. They returned home carrying some sand from the river.  

The two Brahmins took their seats, one facing West and the other facing North. Father invoked the souls of his father, grandfather and great grandfather in them. They were given the dhoties (brought by our vadhyar in a sanctified condition) to wear. Then a homam lasting an hour followed. The feet of the two Brahmins were then washed, with mother also joining. Then they take seat at the leaves for meals, again facing the respective directions. The leaves were big and double, the top one covering half of the one below.

By now, it was already 11 a.m. My parents had not taken a drop of water even. Meanwhile, we the children had the previous day’s food at a separate room, called “kottukoodam”.

Mother kept some cooked rice as the first item in the leaf of the person representing the father. The ritual of serving plain rice on blank leaf was not to be done for living persons.

The vadhyars would have prepared a few receptacles using the plantain leaves. These “thonnais”  also are kept on the side of the leaves. To the accompaniment of ‘manthras’, the various curries were served in the bottom leaf. The sweets, snacks and fruits are served on the left side of the other leaf. The Brahmins would not speak while eating. If they needed anything, they had to show the spot in the leaf with their finger. They kept the left over material in the thonnais. They should be well fed in order to please our ancestors.

 

After they got up, they were made to sit and given ‘dakshinas’ and ‘thamboolam’. All in the household had to do ‘pradakshina’ (go round them), the youngest leading the line. Then father kept his second dhoti spread out from his shoulder and receive the rice grains as the blessing from the ancestors. As they leave, father kept his angavastra spread on the floor leading to the exit door. They were supposed to walk over that as they left the house.

By then, it used to be around 2 p.m. At last, everyone felt happy that it all ended well. A roll of rice with some curd was kept outside in the backyard, away from the reach of a dog. We watched the crow, hoping that it did not start eating facing South. Only after the crow started eating, my parents could eat.

Father and the children ate the food first, followed by mother. In some houses, the lady ate in the same leaf as her husband’s. Any portion left could not be given away to beggar or maid servant or other relatives. So, mother combined all the curries and boiled it together for use next day. The left-over food by the Brahmins should be dropped in a pit in the backyard, specially prepared for the purpose and covered well with mud, to avoid cows and dogs eating it.

In some houses, the vadhyar, who guided the person to conduct the sraadha, often got his meal in the same house. But, he would be given a separately cooked meal as he could not be given the served for the other Brahmins.

By the time mother had her food, it would be around 3 p.m. Till then, she would not have even a drop of water.

The leaf for brahmins during ‘sraadham’	The two types of palakais